no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Panties = found
Randomize
