Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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