I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
