i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
