I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
