Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
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