so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
