why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
And then he peed in my hair
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