You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
