47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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