I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
