we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS