I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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