Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
