Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
