I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
