we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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