he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
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I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
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He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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