K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Please don't give away my fajitas
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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