office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
