So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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