i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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