drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
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