with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
