question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
