On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
