he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
you made out with another girl for some wings
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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