barbara walters just said penis...
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
my liver is dry heaving
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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