What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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