A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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