You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
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Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
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Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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