Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
