We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
