Cold hands, warm shart.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
