I cockslap morals
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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