Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
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I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
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Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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