I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
