I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
