So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Randomize
