Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize