I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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