saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize