Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
