is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
