oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
