covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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