I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
