He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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