it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
