I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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