My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize